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Comment by Eric Andrist on March 20, 2012 at 9:24am

Not everyone was raised like you, Leonard. You're putting unrealistic expectations on others and then festering about it. 

I agree that it's nice for people to be grateful when others do for them, but I just find it bizarre that anyone EXPECTS to be thanked for doing a good deed because of the way they were raised. I was raised, not unlike Bob Rowe, to do for others with no expectations of a thanks or to be given back in return. That's the true nature of giving.  If you expect something in return, it's a barter, not a gift.  

Comment by Leonard Smith on March 20, 2012 at 9:19am

I have added many photos to memorials others have created and I expect no thanks for that. I suppose it is part of my obsessive/compulsive personality to do so. Much of the reason I take photos and create memorials is pay back for the work others have done that has benefited me. I have filled in numerous details in my family history because of what others have done. 

I always thank people for favors they do for me. It is how I was raised. It is disrespectful to do otherwise. 

Comment by Bob Rowe on March 20, 2012 at 9:05am

I believe I have been thanked by everyone. But, I don't keep track. I have provided photos for more memorials without a request than with a request. I feel that if someone took the time to create a memorial, I could take the time to add a photo to it. Sometimes the 'owner' sees the photo a year or two afterwards and says thanks.
God has given us gifts and abilities to help others. It is icing on the cake if we get thanked for it, but we are also called to do things randomly and anonymously. God knows we have done these things. That is all that counts for me. These are the treasures I store up in heaven.

Comment by Eric Andrist on March 20, 2012 at 8:51am

I think it's disrespectful as well, but I also think it's tacky to point out to the world that you haven't been thanked. If you're truly doing a favor for someone, you should expect NO thanks, and then be happy when you do receive it. Pointing out other people's disrespectfulness is just petty and negates the goodness you did in the first place.

Comment by Eric Andrist on March 20, 2012 at 8:50am

You can't go by the record number of a memorial to know how many records they have because of all the records that have been deleted over time. The way the admins ban people for the smallest infractions and delete hundreds of their memorials will throw off the count. So the record number will always be higher than the actual number of memorials.

Comment by Leonard Smith on March 20, 2012 at 8:49am

I am a believer in courtesy and I am more than happy do take photos and even do free additional research for people. I consider it disrespectful not to thank someone for anything they do for me, especially when it is done gratis. I expect the same courtesy from others. 

Comment by Bill McGroom on March 20, 2012 at 8:46am

Leonard, I have quite a few to send thanks for my efforts

Comment by Eric Andrist on March 20, 2012 at 8:44am

Giving should always occur without expectation of something in return....even a "thank you."  If you're upsetting yourself because someone doesn't thank you, you're not giving for the right reasons. Yes, it's inconsiderate not to thank people for doing something for you, but I think it's just as inconsiderate to point out that you haven't been thanked for doing something nice. It then becomes about notoriety, not giving.

Comment by Leonard Smith on March 20, 2012 at 8:39am

I am wondering what the experience of others is regarding thank yous from people who request photos. It is my experience that very few say thanks when their photo requests are fulfilled. 

Comment by Patricia Black on March 20, 2012 at 8:21am

I took my first volunteer photographs just last week. I have been a member of Findagrave for years!! Very rewarding , and can't wait to search for more tomorrow. 

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